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matthew in the mornings by ~desaparecidita:icondesaparecidita:

Categories Literature > Poetry > General Poetry > Open




i asked if she had heard--

baseball bat to the
car window; fist
through the wall;
pages of
teenage angst, scrawled
clumsily on wrists--
slaughterhouse fridays
mopped up with
tschaikovsky saturdays--

and the lithium pills
everyday in the mornings now.

she said that she hadn’t--

so i told her it was nothing.
©2003-2010 ~desaparecidita
:icondesaparecidita:

Author's Comments

tschaikovsky saturdays
--
comments please


[edit]
1. where the fuck did all these people come from? god bless you all.
2. i'm sorry if you don't like the second line. it stays. if i were to read it aloud, there'd be a subtle pause right there. sorry everyone. it stays.
3. "teenage angst" was not put in because i could not think of a more poetic way to say it. it was put in to be cliche, it was put in to say that that's what matthew is. cliche. that his pain and suffering are not sepcial.
4. i like dashes. they also stay.
5. my apologies if you don't enjoy it, or if it "does not do anything for you". that's the way things go. thanks for reading it anyway. if you really dont understand and want to, note me, or something. yes, the poem means something.
6. mwah!

Daily Deviation

Given 2003-04-26

matthew in the mornings by desaparecidita

So many poems are precocious or assuming. Not this one!Reading "Matthew in the Mornings" by *desaparecidita lets you see into the soul and through the eyes of the neo-renassaince man. He's an incredible poet who can show you peace in words.

Guest Picker: ~endofdayz (Selected by ^keen) (Featured by `keen)

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 1 1 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:icon-blackscarling-:
~-blackscarling- Apr 12, 2003, 3:54:14 PM
Wow.

--
Look. Pink bunnies.
:iconmoonsparked:
~moonsparked Apr 12, 2003, 4:32:35 PM
incredible. simply....
wow.
:iconxxxxxx:
!xxxxxx Apr 12, 2003, 5:05:17 PM
this is very good. The wording is precise and violent. The flow is almost impecable.

--
:gummybear: deviant art will ban you for being mean.
:iconalabamaclay:
~alabamaclay Apr 12, 2003, 5:47:05 PM
yes +fav. I like this a lot.

--
We all know that insects, especially the tiny ones, do not possess, nor can they hold, guns or knives.
:iconaircrash:
~aircrash Apr 12, 2003, 6:11:18 PM
matthew.. i couldn't help but instantly think of james.

Great sense of flow and sensory detail.

I'd critique it if i knew how.
:iconecho-si:
~echo-si Apr 12, 2003, 6:24:40 PM
play with the second line

that is all ^_^
nice work.

--
do your part. love your mother. :earth:

:peace:
:iconubetyourboots:
~ubetyourboots Apr 12, 2003, 6:54:59 PM
The poem is GREAT.

The description is all wrong. I speak for all readers when I say: don't tell me what to think. It makes me want to ram my fist through my computer monitor.

I'd send you the repair bill.

Ube.
:icongirlingreenjacket:
~girlingreenjacket Apr 13, 2003, 6:39:38 AM
i'm with ubetyourboots, don't tell us what it is. but its still awesome.
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